Thursday, October 15, 2009

Don Decker RIP

Readers, if there are any, will be sad to hear of the death of Don Decker, lead singer of the band Anal Blast.

So, wherever you are, and whatever you are doing, please spare 1 minute 53 seconds to stand up and scream your fucking head off:



Anal Blast: Tampon Teabag


Here's another video of the Don showcasing his talents:



Requiscat in pacem, you fucking nutter.

Thursday, October 08, 2009

Norman Geras versus Augustus de Morgan

Norman Geras really needs some lessons in logic:

It's a simple logical point, the very simplest: if you say that a certain doctrine - call it [X] - should be dumped in the nearest skip, and if you also believe that [Y] is, in certain circumstances, a justified policy, it better not be the case that the doctrine of [X] includes the proposition that [Y] is, in certain circumstances, a justified policy. Otherwise you'll be dumping something in the skip that you don't really want to dump there.


Let's test this with some different values of X & Y. I am unapologetic in my view that the doctrine of CHAM (Compulsory Homosexuality for All Men) should be slam-dunked back in the skip whence I have just plucked it. But wait! Among its less controversial policies, CHAM holds that men who wish to engage in homosexual relationships should be free to do so. Therefore, by Norm's argument, I must wish to criminalise gay sex.

Others: X = hanging 'em and flogging 'em, Y = punishing criminals; X = Nazism, Y = opposing communism; X = communism, Y = opposing Nazism. Etc, etc, etc.

I mean, if X is a political doctrine, then just about any value of X would want the bins emptied on time, wouldn't it? So if you've ever taken an opposing political stance to anything at all, then I conclude that you have actively campaigned to see the streets of Britain flooded with stinking, rotting rubbish.

UPDATE: I'm going to be really logicky about this.

If X is a political doctrine then it entails a number of specific policies: a,b,c,... To believe in X means to sign up for each of a,b,c,... (of course in the real world there's more room for manoeuvre, but this is the basic meaning). So X is a conjunction:

X = a AND b AND c AND...

Now, if we want to negate X, that is assert that X is false, all that is necessary is that one of a,b,c,... fails. This is de Morgan's second law. So...

NOT X = (NOT a) OR (NOT b) OR (NOT c)...

Norm's error is in believing that to reject X it is necessary to reject each of a,b,c,...:

NOT X should be (NOT a) AND (NOT b) AND (NOT c)...

Norm concludes his 2000 word expounding of the above mistake by accusing Conor Foley of having tied himself in "logical knots", and of producing "flannel".

Friday, July 17, 2009

Monday, May 04, 2009

The ever-widening family

You've read Tampon Teabag, the seldom updated blog.

You've listened to Tampon Teabag, the Anal Blast song.

You've watched Tampon Teabag, the very short video clip.

Now, drink from Tampon Teabag: the cartoon mug!

(Nothing to do with me, blame these folks.)

Saturday, April 18, 2009

In the key of hard

What does a pianist do once he's mastered Chopin and Rachmaninov? When you've transcribed all of Art Tatum, and played Vladimir Horowitz' arrangement of Liszt's Hungarian Rhapsody No 2 till you're sick?

What's next when settling down to Charles-Valentin Alkan's Concerto for Solo Piano (I(i),I(ii),I(iii),II, and III for the fireworks) induces only yawns?

Well, there's Kaikhosru Shapurji Sorabji's Opus Clavicembalisticum (a few minutes from the four and a half hours can be heard here)... but I did that last night.

Michael Finissy's Solo Piano Concerto Number 4 is always good for a grin... and if I'm really desperate there's Stockhausen's Klavierstuck X again, I suppose.

But no. I need a new challenge.

So I'm grateful to Ivan for pointing me towards John Stump's Faerie's Aire and Death Waltz. It's based on a Cro-magnon skinning chant. I'll need to stock up on penguins, though.



Even better, once I've mastered that, there are many more wonderful manuscripts here, here, and here.

The only one which worries me is Ervin Schulhoff's 1919 composition In futurum:




King's Cock

If I was a convicted sex-offender desperately trying to clear my name, I probably wouldn't write and perform songs like this:



That's from Jonathan King's 2008 musical Vile Pervert, viewable here, reviewed here.

Come to think of it, if I was eager to paint myself as the innocent victim of a miscarriage of justice, I probably wouldn't choose Harold Shipman as metaphor for my cruel mistreatment by the media.

I will say this though: being done for fiddling has livened up King's creative output no end. I wouldn't have given his cheesy shite a second thought before. But I'm only 1 minute into Vile Pervert, and he's already got his cock out (followed up with full screen splashes of Jesus and Mother Theresa).

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Retreat into virtuality

You may have been wondering where I've been... I haven't been around these parts much, but I've online all right. In fact, I've been online way, way too much.

You know those pasty teenagers who never leave their bedrooms, and spend days at a stretch playing World of Warcraft? Well, that's me that is.

Except that I can't claim youth as an excuse.

And it isn't a fantasy game which has done for me either. I can't be bothered with wizards and elves and that. I prefer game-environments which mimic the real world more closely... I know, I know, why not just go outside?

It's difficult to say. I guess it's the immediate gratification, plus the brilliantly crafted suspense, which just keeps you slumped there, in your chair. There's always a task to complete, and then more to do, more to see, more to experience.

And you get so deeply involved with your game-self, even to the point of feeling responsibility for his fate, almost associating yourself with him: in truth, it stops being a 'game' at this point.

The world I've been immersed in is based around a survival-horror quest, and has been rightly hailed as "probably the greatest adventure game ever created" (although I'm beginning to wish it never had been). It's called Don't Shit Your Pants, and you can give it a try here. Have fun. But please, try not to lose yourself.

[via DJCJD]

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Smear-o-sphere

So Paul Staines has exposed Damian McBride as a smear-artist.

...and next week Nick Griffin outs Jim Davidson as a racist, and Colonel Sanders lectures Ronald McDonald on healthy eating.

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